Jim vs Beer Pong

Pong. Originally a frathouse novelty, it has spiralled into a global phenomenon sparking millions of YouTube Videos, and even an international tournament with a cash prize. However, if ya'll ever plan on attending a festive gathering, avoid the BP table like the plague. Here's why...

I'll start with the name. Anyone with more than 3 synapses connected can deduce the moniker 'beer pong' was conceived in such a manner.

(Basement of a frat house. Seeking amusement that involves light consumption of alcohol and competition, two bros sail into uncharted waters)
Bored College Kid 1: Bro, I'm bored and I want to drink.
Bored College Kid 2: Ditto, my man. Lets go beer bowling on this ping-pong table.
BCK1: Chyeah... Wait, we'd waste beer on the floor.
BCK2: You're totally right, lets toss these balls in the cups instead.
BCK1: Its like ping pong with Beer.
BCK2: Yeah, its like Beer Pong
Both: Sick

The name stuck despite bearing no resemblance to ping pong except for the ball. Its like calling kickball, base-soccer. (As an aside to further the baseball - bp analogy; both games are largely spent standing around and chasing out-of-play-balls).

In addition to having an absolutely terrible name, BP is a monumental waste of resources. The large tables become obstacles for guests to navigate creating unwanted congestion. The snail pace of the game and the paltry amount of participants leads to the formation of large lines of prospective players. Time and space are not the only resources inefficiently allocated. Due to the messy nature of the game, many fluid ounces of beverage are lost the the ground and table.

Lastly, pong is the biggest cop out at any gathering. It is what party goers default to when they have exhausted all other options. I can only speak for myself, but when I hit the town, I hope to meet people and spark interesting conversation. Playing pong makes these objectives untenable. The competitive nature of the game almost automatically rules out fraternizing with the other side of the table. This iron curtain prevents any communication and a hint of animosity, both or which are huge dampers on any potential good time. Think back to the best time you had going out. I doubt any part of that night involved tossing ping pong balls into red cups. Now thing of the worst night in memory. Yup, bp was definitely there.

Unfortunately, I fear too many people have eaten the beer pong lotus, and the scourge will continue to live on. But now you can use your best judgement to run like hell when you see the cups being lined up.